Marital Moments Issue 22 - 100th Post!

It is timely that my 100th post is on a Marital Moment day. I began this blog awhile ago because I felt God prompting me to start one. Honestly, I barely knew what a blog was and didn't know if I wanted to put my thoughts and heart out here on the internet for anyone to read. I have been through a lot in my life. I have learned so much along the way and God has opened my eyes and heart to see Him in the everyday, ordinary parts of my life.

A huge part of why I enjoy blogging is because I have a passion for people reaching their God given potential in life and marriage. Those passions have been birthed out of pain, loss, suffering, love, joy and peace in my own life. I am writing this blog because it is a part of my own purpose in Christ.

I fear that occasionally when people read, they may think I am trying to sound like I have it all together; that is not the case. I am learning every day. Often, the things I post about are things that God is at work on in my own heart. I fail. (often) My husband fails. My kids fail. Even our cat doesn't have it all together! But our character is being shaped (in our teachable moments), our love for each other grows (even when we have days where we don't "like" each other very much), and our God is faithful always -even when we are not.

God has been at work in my heart in the area of respect and submission lately. The new sermon series at church is on the topic, we just had a devotional on it in our MOPS group (Mothers of Preschoolers), and it is something that does not necessarily come easily to me. It is easier to believe that someone has to earn my respect on a daily basis rather than for me to respect someone's position and to automatically submit because of that role or position.

Growing up we had relatives who we jokingly referred to as "The Bickersons." As children, we would count the minutes until we could leave when we went to their house. Although they chose to marry one another; it was as if they were not willing to allow themselves to be a reflection of one another. They would often sarcastically put each other down so they could be the one who was "right," more informed, and approved of. They were so insecure in who they each were as individuals and yet convinced that they were each somehow better than the other. It was draining to be around.

Most of us have heard the Scriptures about wives submitting to their husbands. (Ephesians 5:22; 5:24 & Colossians 3:18) However; the Scriptures that have really been jumping out to me are ones that happen as a result of proper submission.

"Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life." (Proverbs 31:11-12) "Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land." (Proverbs 31:23) "

Now the Proverbs 31 woman is one that I think we all kind of look at with a bit of disdain sometimes. It seems overwhelming to do all that is in this passage of Scripture; but one area we can and should work on is building the confidence of our husbands, bringing them good, and respecting them in front of others so that they, in turn, will also respect our men.

This truth hit me as I was praying over my son the other night. Each night before bed we pray together and I was praying for his future wife. I heard myself say (do you ever do that or am I the only one?) "Please bless him with a wife who will love and respect him unconditionally. As soon as the words were out of my mouth it was as if the Holy Spirit was asking me, "Do you love and respect your husband unconditionally?" The bitter truth is that there are days when I want him to earn my respect. My prayer for my son's wife turned into my prayer for myself.

"Dear Lord, please help me to love and respect my husband unconditionally. Allow him to have confidence in me. Allow me to bring him good all the days of my life. I pray that my husband would be respected by others because they can see the respect that I have for him."

One other powerful Scripture on submission for any of you who have a spouse who does not know the Lord:

"Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives." (I Peter 3:1)

Thank you to each of you who read my blog. Your comments and friendships are truly a blessing and encouragement to me! I pray that God is blessing you and working in your hearts!

Shanda